It concerns me that I know lawyers that don't seem to understand the Constitution. Well, most people don't seem to understand it. Freedom of speech does not mean freedom from consequences. As long as the government isn't infringing upon your speech, anyone else is free to tell you you're being an asshole. They're even free to fire you.

Love Is...

Not supposed to be hard. This is not to say that it doesn't take effort to maintain a relationship, but the back and forth, will-they/won't they of movies doesn't work in real life. Rarely do you break up with someone multiple times and still have that person be a good match for you. Generally, you break up with someone for a good reason, and you should never look back. Good relationships should make you the best person you can be, and they should elevate you. They shouldn't make you miserable or unhappy.

I Like Pink. I Like Princesses. I'm an Astrophysicist.

Deal with it.

This video has been getting lots of shares around Facebook, which is not surprising, given that I know a lot of ladies in science:

While I don't have problems with the product, I've been getting more and more prickly about the presentation. See, every time people try to talk up how awesome science is, they have a tendency to put down things like "pink" and "princesses." It makes things that are traditionally "feminine" into something that's bad, like there's something wrong with it. That the ideal state is "masculine." And that's pretty bad, too. And as someone who likes those things, it makes me feel like I'm not a "real" scientist.

I've always been traditionally "girly" and "prissy." As a baby, my mom would try to get me to play in the dirt. I didn't want to get dirty. When I had the ability to pick out my own clothing, it was strictly pink and skirts and dresses until 2nd grade, when I occasionally started to wear stirrup pants and bike shorts under giant, baggy t-shirts(it was the early 1990s; please don't mock my sartorial choices). I refused to wear jeans until I was 12 or 13. When people asked me my favorite color, I would say "Pink, blue is for boys." (I eventually grew out of that, and I wasn't getting that attitude at home, so clearly, there was some socialization going on.)

When it came to toys, maybe choices were less gendered than they are now, but when I was very young (pre-school age) all of the toys my parents had for me were gender-neutral. Legos, train sets, giant colored blocks, this set that you made towers with and then dropped marbles down the track (my mom LOOOOVED the noise that made!). I concede that it is entirely possible that my parents actively avoided the gendered toys, but I have to believe these items still exist for children. There were also toys like Lincoln logs and tesselation blocks, which I wanted so badly but never got. I really liked these toys, but I also really liked playing dress-up in my sparkliest, most princess-y outfits. My mom wouldn't buy me Barbie dolls, although family members did, so they weren't verboten. As I got older, I tended towards these more feminine toys. I had a lot of barbies and barbie accessories (including Disney princesses!), American Girl dolls, and one of my favorite games was Pretty Pretty Princesess.

Despite all these gendered toys that I preferred as I got older, I still managed to do science. We had elementary school science fairs, and my projects in 5th and 6th grade were pretty kick-ass. Ask me about my 6th grade project on the fat content in ice cream. I was doing extremely sophisticated sampling for a 6th grader. Even though I didn't play with "science" toys, my parents still encouraged me to keep up my interest in the subject, while simultaneously not keeping me from the more "girly" things that I enjoyed. I think that's what's missing from the discussion. Rather than discouraging girls from liking pink and princesses, we should let them know that it's ok to simultaneously like math and science. This requires parental guidance, but I'm guessing that the people who are buying their kids educational toys and who are interested in these issues are able to put that kind of effort in their parenting. There's really no need to put one thing down to build something else up. Just keep an open conversation with your kids about these issues, and they'll turn out fine. And if it turns out they like princesses AND science (or even just princesses), they'll know that there's nothing to be ashamed of.

Fuck Everything

Fuck Republicans. Fuck the Tea Party. Fuck rape culture. Fuck victim blaming. Fuck the patriarchy. Fuck misogyny. Fuck classism. Fuck racism. Fuck sexism. Fuck all of the other "isms." Fuck the little asshole football players in Steubenville and Maryville who get away with rape because they're local Gods. Fuck not taking "no" for an answer. Fuck the fact that the government shutdown is costing the people I care about their livelihood. And it's costing me mine.

I Don't Care About Your Food "Sensitivities"

Note: If you have food allergies that can cause death, this does not apply to you. This does not apply to you if you've gone to the doctor and had allergy tests and you have a real food allergy. I understand that those are nothing to fuck around with. This is for the morons that claim they have some sort of "sensitivity" that has no basis in reality.

Here's the thing--your food issues are just not that interesting to me, so stop posting about them on Facebook (and yes, I could just filter things, but this is my blog and I'll rant if I want to). I find that people with genuine allergies don't spend all that much time telling people about them. If it's germane, they'll bring it up, but they don't spend all their time on Facebook detailing the effects of their "sensitivities" on their bodies. If you're doing it at home, it's just as likely that the placebo effect is taking place. You think you'll feel better if you cut out gluten, and then lo and behold, you do! You must be allergic to gluten! And now you're going to tell EVERYONE about how gluten is the devil and if only they'd stop eating it they'd feel SOOOOOOO much better. Yeah...I think you're full of shit.

It's also insufferably boring. Like, don't you have ANYTHING else to talk about? Weather? Politics? No, we can only discuss you're crippling wheat allergy that gives you vague symptoms. You feel "fatigued." I'm so sure that's the gluten. Try getting more sleep and then get back to me. It causes "inflammation." What the fuck does that mean? No seriously, how can you tell if you're "inflammed?"

In conclusion, I don't give a fuck about your food issues. If you've cooked something interesting, by all means let Facebook know. I love cooking! I'd love to see what you made! But I don't care about how it affects your bowels, your knees, or your overall health. You're probably just making that up.